When it comes to flirting
, it’s really important to be approachable. Being approachable means that you seem cool, welcoming, and okay to approach. It comes from a combination of things.
Give off Positive Energy
Positive energy is the energy someone gives off when they always look at the bright side of things. It’s that cheerful attitude that makes people easy and fun to be around.
It’s not easy to be positive all the time, but upbeat people experience a lot of benefits. Studies show optimistic people have stronger immune systems. They also have an easier time dealing with stress and they generally feel better, emotionally, than other people.
Plus, positive energy can help get you dates!
Exuding positive energy is very uplifting and attractive. In fact, a lot of singles feel that dating someone with great energy is a non-negotiable
Think about how it feels to be around positive people versus when you’re around negative people
. Nobody wants to be around people who complain a lot. It’s exhausting. And most of us certainly don’t want to date people who focus on their woes.
So, a smart goal is to be a positive as possible. Especially when flirting. The problem is, sometimes we can project negative energy and not even know it. So, it’s really important that you’re aware of the energy you project
That means put your cell phone away.
My girlfriends used to complain
that were “no good guys in LA.” There are nine million people in Los Angeles. The idea that none of them were good single men is ridiculous.
I always joke that the key to meeting men is to put your phone down long enough to notice them. But it’s true. One of the most important things you can do when you’re ready to date is be present
Thank about it. How are you going to meet the guy of your dreams if you’re busy staring at your phone?
We’ve gotten used to using our phones as a crutch. When we wait for our lunch order, we check Facebook. When our friends are late getting to the bar, we text until they get there.
But what if you didn’t? What if you put your phone away and forced yourself to take a look around. What do you think you might see? Who do you think you might meet?
Beyond being a distraction, your phone is a manblocker. When you stare at it, you practically wear a sign that says, “Do not talk to me.”
What guy is going to want to approach someone who is clearly busy? No one. So even if you don’t see him, but he sees you, he’s still not going to approach.
Lastly, if you are interacting with someone, do not play with your phone
. Checking your phone or texting will give a guy the vibe that you are not interested in him. Plus it’s rude. No one wants to date someone who is rude.
Show Positive Body Language
Showing positive body language may sound like a no-brainer, but like we learned with energy, sometimes we don’t realize we’re putting out negative vibes.
Simple things like a hand on a hip, or arms crossed over your chest or slumped shoulders can say things about you that you may not want other people to hear.
Be open and non-confrontational. Uncross your arms. Relax. Fold your hands or slide them in your pockets.
Stand up straight. Smile. Make eye contact. Be friendly. Watch your tone of voice. While this may not technically be body language, your tone of voice is huge. Keep it positive.
Watch for nervous gestures. If you know you flap your hands like wings when you get nervous, put them in your pockets.
By giving off positive energy, limiting distractions and showing positive body language, you should be ready to flirt and get your Fantasy Dating
game on. As you flirt and start dating, take notes of what works for you.
How do you show the people around you that you’re approachable?