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Player Question: He Didn’t Call Back. What Should I Do Now?

Dear Fantasy Dating,

I need some advice. I had a crush on this guy who we’ll call Rick. So one Friday night he calls me.

Rick: “Hey Rebecca. I’m going to a BBQ tomorrow and I thought I’d see if you wanted to come.”

Me (heart jackhammering my chest): “Oh? That sounds good.”

Rick: “K. I’ll call you tomorrow with the details, okay?”

Me: “Okay.”

So, the next day I’m like barely breathing. Nervous stomach. Can’t eat, can’t think. I’m like a sixth grader excited for her first dance.

When he calls, I’m at a baseball game with my league mates. I don’t hear the phone over the screaming Dodger fans. It’s not until we leave the park that I hear his message.

Rick: “Hey Rebecca, the BBQ got canceled. So, I’m out running errands. I’ll talk to you shortly.”

My girls and I discuss it on the way home. “I’ll talk to you shortly,” is much different than “Talk to you later” or just plain old “good-bye.” I felt like he was expecting me to call him back.

So I did. I left him this message, “Hey Rick, sorry to hear about the BBQ. I’m thinking about going to a party with some friends. If you’re interested, give me a call.”

He never called. So what the heck am I supposed to do now? Should I call him again?

Dear Rebecca,

What you’re supposed to do now is look at the facts:

Fact #1: Rick called twice. That’s 6 Fantasy Dating points for YOU! Cheers! Nice work!

Fact #2: You made some good moves:

- You didn’t call first

- You only called back after receiving a message

- You never called him again

Now, none of this led to love with Rick. But after a guy calls, asks you to a BBQ, calls back to cancel, and doesn’t return your call, should you want to love Rick? Seriously, why would you want to be with someone who doesn’t think you’re important enough to follow up with?

This is the universe making room for a guy who’s going to be fully into you. Just celebrate your six points and move on!




  1. September 9, 2013

    I’ll admit. I’ve called back before. Even after he never called. Pathetic. I’d never do that now. There’s no need. So many men…so many points!

    • fdadmin

      October 2, 2013

      Awesome! We love that Fantasy Dating has changed the way you play the field!

  2. OliveJuice

    September 9, 2013

    If he doesn’t call, he’s obviously not that into you. NEXT! ;)

  3. September 10, 2013

    In this situation, you shouldn’t call him back. But it’s so hard to say never call again if he doesn’t call. It depends on the guy, the circumstances, how many times you’ve dated, how well you know him, etc. Sometimes there really is something going on or a reason he didn’t call. It doesn’t ALWAYS come down to “He’s just not that into you.”

    • fdadmin

      October 2, 2013

      And that’s where you gotta trust your gut. Judgement calls are part of the game. Be your own ref and take it one play at a time!

  4. Singles Warehouse

    January 15, 2014

    We all have a need for closure – but sometimes we don’t get it.

    Just remember you tried and move on…

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